from The 7th House: Marriage
The Institution of Marriage
Vedic astrology makes an important distinction between an intimate relationship and marriage. Although marriage may seem like a mere formality in our contemporary society, from a Vedic astrological standpoint, an indissoluble bond is created by joining in matrimony that does not exist in a courtship, even if the courtship has lasted a decade.
It’s not uncommon for couples who have dated or even lived together for years to eventually decide to marry. However, if the planets in their charts do not support marriage, soon after the wedding the couple may feel like strangers. They sense that they made a big mistake. This happens because during courtship, antagonistic planets between two people slide over each other easily, as if Teflon-coated. Points of contention or great differences don't strongly impede the way they get along. In fact, often disagreements are explained away as being unimportant or even the spice that keeps things interesting. Generally, the rough spots don't stay difficult for long.
But when a couple whose planets are antagonistic decides to marry, those planets lock together. Suddenly those points of stress that could once slip in and out of tension are locked, and a person may feel trapped, suffocated, or overwhelmed by the energy of the other. Or they can feel a sudden distance, as if their spouse was just a friend instead of a husband or a wife (same-sex marriages work the same way). The little things that used to be endearing idiosyncrasies during a courtship can become intensely annoying or off-putting in a marriage. Nonetheless, if you are committed to making a marriage work, and you are willing to concentrate on healing the negativity between you and your partner, you can make the marriage last. Your own will, passion and compassion, can bring about enormous results. But please, consult the planets first!
When analyzing two charts for compatibility in marriage, it's important that the Moons and Venuses be well-placed. Good placements include conjunction (in the same house), sextile (the 3rd house from itself), trine (the 5th house from itself) and opposition (the 7th house from itself).
Harmony in relationships is challenged when planets are in square (the 4th house from itself), or in the 6th, 8th, or 2nd and 12th houses from each other.
The rising signs can be in square as long as you thrive on being with someone whose external expression of himself or herself is quite different from your own. Otherwise, the rising signs should be conjunct, in sextile, trine or opposition positions.
When considering planetary compatibility, recognize that the house that planet occupies will inflect the characteristic of the planet with its own temperament. So even if the aspects are favorable, the way those planets interact may not be satisfactory.
Let's look at some compatibility in charts:
For an example of a nice courtship that became a marriage from hell, below are the charts of Sharon and Ken.
Sharon was born with Pisces rising. Looking at her 7th house, Virgo, we see no planets. But the ruler of Virgo, Mercury, is in her 8th house. The 8th house, being a house of loss, indicates the potential failure of her first marriage. An astrologer could see this woman's chart on the day of her birth and know that she was likely to suffer at least one divorce because of this planetary configuration. Although we don't know Ken's time of birth, what's more important in this example are the planets he has in Virgo, since Virgo is Sharon’s 7th house.
Ken has Mercury (a neutral planet, taking on the power of the planet most powerfully influencing it-- in this case, malefic Mars), Jupiter, and Sun all placed in Virgo. Although his Jupiter would normally be beneficial for his partner, since it aspects her rising sign, unfortunately his Jupiter is very close to the Sun, creating a combustion. The beneficial affects of Jupiter are lessened greatly by the Sun.
With four intense planets occupying Sharon’s 7th house, Ken’s and her relationship was a whirlwind of intense sexuality, passion, obsession, and arguments. In Ken, Sharon had finally found the hot-blooded lover she had wanted, and they decided to marry.
If only they had known about Vedic astrology!
When the Mars of one person occupies the 7th house of the person he or she marries, there is a tendency for the person they marry to be promiscuous. The Mars in Virgo for Ken also aspects his Aries Moon, giving him an explosive temper. Sharon’s Saturn hits its enemy Mars in Ken’s chart almost to the exact degree from Cancer. Finally, Sharon’s Mars and Sun sit directly on their enemy, Saturn, in Ken’s chart, in the house of intensely emotional Scorpio.
This all makes for a highly inflammatory relationship.
The passion Ken and Sharon felt turned to antagonism the moment they married. The catalyst planets, the Saturn and Mars in her chart, locked strongly with the enemies Mars and Sun in his chart. Even though neither Sharon nor Ken intentionally set out to hurt each other, the nature of their planets, when locked in by marriage became extremely antagonistic.
Just as the influences of difficult planets can be amplified, so too can the positive effects of planets. When well-placed planets are further enhanced by marriage, the results can be rewarding on every level. For instance, I have a client, Calvin, who was in terrible financial shape when he met the woman he was to marry. Within several months of marrying Jill, however, he was suddenly worth more than $1 million. Why?
Jill’s exalted Sun sits on Calvin’s rising sign, enhancing his confidence. Her powerful Venus aspects his 2nd house, bringing support to his house of wealth. Her exalted Mars placed in his 10th house on his debilitated Jupiter gave him the energy to succeed professionally. . . . With a woman like that, a man can go places. Her planets fortify not just the wealth houses but his entire chart.
Cause and Effect
The Four Goals of Life
How I Discovered Vedic Astrology
A Good Place to Start
Part I: The Basics
Birth Time Adjustment
Step 1--The Nature of the Rising Sign (1st House)
Step 2--Planets in the 1st House
Step 3--No Planets in the 1st House
Planets and Their Meanings
Planetary Exaltation and Debilitation
Planetary Friends and Enemies
Mahadasha--The Major Cycle of the Planets
Another Method of Prediction--Transits
Part II: Reading Charts
The 1st House--The Body
The 2nd House--Wealth
The 3rd House--Creativity
The 4th House--The mother
The 5th House--Children
The 6th House--Enemies
The 7th House--Marriage
The 8th House--Transformation
The 9th House--The father
The 10th House--Career
The 11th house--Opportunity
The 12th house--Actualization
Appendix: Vedic Astrology Resources
Marija Sanderling, Library Journal, August 2003